The Deepest Calling In Relationship

Aug 7, 2015 | Musings From A Prayerful Heart

Picture

Relationship, in all its many forms, is sacred, exquisite, essential, mysterious~ and oftentimes messy, troubled, loaded and charged. 

Whether we are married or single, wishing to be free of a partnership that has run its course, or actively calling a partnership in; whether we are delightfully dating, waiting for love, or exhausted by the search; whether we are monogamous or polyamorous, happily or unhappily sexually active, desperately wishing for sex, simply and honestly disinterested in sex, or deliberately celibate; whether our parents are still alive or have passed, and whether we have children or are childless; whether we have a vast social network of friendships, peers, teachers, students, clients, healers, patients, bosses, co-workers or employees, or whether we find ourselves mostly alone, with very few people in our lives~ regardless, the opportunity in relationship, for all of us, is the same: to discover the deepest calling that all relationship is reflecting, revealing, invoking and inviting, and to be true to this call. 

Relationship has something deeper for us than what we tend to look to it for.
Deeper than needing anyone to give us anything, and deeper than our need to feel valuable to any other; deeper than our need to be loving, or feel we are loved; deeper than our yearning to feel seen and worthy and wanted; deeper than our desire to feel safe and connected, needing and needed, to hold and be held; deeper than our wish to feel powerful and successful; deeper than our longing to be met by another in the fullest way; deeper than our desire to be useful or talented, to be good, kind, helpful and caring; deeper than our wish to be sexy, juicy, attractive and exciting, desired and desirous; deeper than the fulfillment of bringing joy and pleasure, and deeper than our love for orgasm; deeper than the way we look to community, to who we know and who we want to know and be known by, fixating on our place in the herd; deeper than our want to be rescued and healed, to provide or be provided for; deeper than our resentment of others needs and expectations; deeper than our story of loneliness or martyrdom, fault or blame, stagnation, frustration, jealousy and possessiveness; deeper than our identification with all the roles we play~ as parents and children, husbands and wives, ex-husbands and ex-wives, lovers and healers, sisters and brothers, friends and companions, providers and teachers and students, presidents and CEO’s, assistants and servants, artists and seekers; deeper than our greatest suffering and greatest joy in relationship, there is a calling waiting to be discovered, that which ALL relationship, at the core, is in service of.

That calling is to discover the deepest Truth of who you are; who one is. In order to discover this, we have to exhaust, at least for one full instant, all the rest of what we look to relationship for. We have to be curious about what could possibly be deeper than all we engage in relationally. In this supreme discovery there is a possibility of realizing our own wholeness, our freedom and joy: simply in Being. There is a chance to come all the way home to this LOVE we are, and to discover in this, regardless of all relationship or lack of relationship, we are already beyond loveable and worthy, not for anything we do or give or take or transmit or deliver, and in spite of all our shortcomings, limitations and mistakes. We can discover we are already more than fulfilled and met, inside the vast embrace of our own exquisite love. We can come home to this if we choose, and rest with the Beloved within.

From this place, of not needing any relationship or role we play to give us anything, we can revel in the mysterious design which allows Oneself to show up as many, and bow with awe in the face of such truly wondrous, multi-faceted, multi-dimensional, multi-talented and gifted forms of countless individuals incarnate! We can open to receive the great meeting that happens, through so many different relational flavors, and in this great diversity of roles we play. We can choose to meet Self to Self, wholeness to wholeness, heart to heart, consciousness to consciousness, love to love.

We can choose to rise to the occasion of the deliciousness, the exquisite sobriety, and the sacred responsibility of True Relationship; personal and impersonal, intimate, collective and universal, alongside our essential aloneness, and cherish our mysterious time together in form, in spirit, in life.

Then, oh then, a great opportunity for true relating arises, with all whom we meet. Nothing to get or be gotten; nothing to sell or be sold, nothing to want or be wanted for; love takes care of it all. Love takes care of it all. 

Facebook Comments

More Blog Posts

Praising Angels

Praising Angels

One of the many gifts that came from my early childhood intimacy with traumatizing illness, was the way in which it opened my psychic centers to be able to “see” and “hear” energetic realities that remain elusive for most. While it took me a couple of decades to work...

Stewarding a New Way

Stewarding a New Way

As I witness all this outrageous trauma playing out on the global stage between man and woman, one of the most poignant components it illuminates for me is the power we hold in how we choose to steward our daughters and sons in these times. What is our part to play in...

Smoky Grateful Boredom Breakthroughs

Smoky Grateful Boredom Breakthroughs

My son Ezra and I had a glorious breakthrough about boredom a few days ago, and I’m inspired to share it with you, in case it just might be contagious. (And no, it wasn’t about boredom breeding creativity or genius or whatever it was someone wise once said, though I’m...

A Year of Leaning In

A Year of Leaning In

A couple of weeks ago Orionne and I celebrated our one year anniversary! What a meaningful threshold for us to cross. And what a profound year of leaning in it has been. We met (re-met) one year ago in July and immediately bowed in to a most extraordinary love. We...

“Free of Mom”~ Attachment & Surrender

“Free of Mom”~ Attachment & Surrender

The other morning I was sitting at my desk writing, when suddenly my son Ezra was beside me, tapping me on the shoulder in his fluffy red bathrobe. As I turned to greet his morning brightness, he surprised me by tumbling completely into my arms, so I had to move fast...

“But either way, isn’t Love always the answer?”

“But either way, isn’t Love always the answer?”

“But any way you look at it, isn’t Love always the answer?” That’s what my beloved partner said to me yesterday with fierce truth pouring from moist eyes, devotedly calling me back, in a moment when defense had gotten the better of me, to the common ground of our...

Graduation from a Life Chapter; The Endless Changing of Form

Graduation from a Life Chapter; The Endless Changing of Form

I’ve got some big news to share~ about a large life change in the works for my sweet family. One night, about 6 weeks ago, as I closed my eyes to go to sleep, I was suddenly struck with an unexpected lightning bolt of revelation. It went something like this: “And Now You will Move With The Children Back To Ashland.” It truly felt more like an announcement from my soul, than any kind of choice I was being offered to contemplate. I was shocked, confused, and somewhat triggered. I […]

Being Single~ Yearning, Prayer, Surrender and Fulfillment

Being Single~ Yearning, Prayer, Surrender and Fulfillment

Garethrockliffe.com I’m inspired to tell you a story from a recent bedtime conversation I had with my son, on the topic of being single, and the prayer for partnership. It’s a tender topic to personally speak and write about, but one that so many of us share in common. And so I humbly offer my voice to the collective conversation.I’ve been contemplating my own single womanhood and single motherhood a lot lately, in a particularly focused way. It’s interesting to consider the stigm […]

Nurturing Self-Love as Healthy Self-Image~ A Clothes-Shopping Story

Nurturing Self-Love as Healthy Self-Image~ A Clothes-Shopping Story

Due to the vulnerable nature of this writing, this piece is published with explicit permission and blessings from my brave and generous daughter Arayla, who after reading it shared her hope that our story might serve in some small way~ especially other mothers and daughters, in navigating the steep challenge of healthy self- image and radical self-love in our culture. One of my most treasured delights as the mother of my beloved daughter Arayla, (newly 12 years old,) is the incredibly swee […]

Our World, Our Mirror~ Rupture, Projection, Responsibility & Repair

Our World, Our Mirror~ Rupture, Projection, Responsibility & Repair

It's difficult to know what to say in these times, but I'll give it a try.  While this horrifying drama is playing out on the world stage, I’m finding it useful to notice how this translates in my own privileged life. For it to get this crazy on the outer stage of our...